Death Doesn't Bargain

Your ex is dead.

Just as simple as that. And I thought it was just one of my friend's ill-mannered sms jokes.

Unfortunately, it wasn't.

Another sms arrived. It contained the details of his death. Acute Pancreatitis (inflammation of the pancreas, a digestive gland in the abdominal cavity. Symptoms may include abdominal pain, nausea, constipation, and jaundice) - the cruel culprit. I'm sure my mind, upon reading the message, can't accept the glaring fact that just happened. I was in a state of denial. I chose to dwell in that state for quite some time.

The fact won't sink in. I know it was true. But I can't accept it...just yet. Truth be told, I'm not good at losses. I mean, I can lose material things (which rarely happens) and dismiss the thought with a shrug. But losing people is a different thing especially if it means you will no longer see them for the rest of your life. I can afford to lose material things because I can replace them. But I can't replace people. I can't replace lives.

We separated in a good way - not so good though. But we've patched things up. Few months back, we were good. We hang out with his friends and homeboys. We played together. We enjoyed each other's company. I don't have the slightest idea it will be the last.

It was a total shock. It was a solid blow. Up to this very moment, I refuse to believe he's gone - physically.

I can still feel him. I am still thinking of him. And his memories will forever linger in my mind and in my heart. But I just want to tell him that I appreciate everything that he's done me. I love how he loved me and I will miss him dearly.

Thank you for sharing your life with me. Thank you for the gift of you. May God bless you in your journey.

One day we will meet and the Author of Life will lead us where we belong. Somewhere eternal. Somewhere where there is no end.

True. There is LIFE in DEATH.

Bigger Is Better

Awrayt. NAIA Terminal 3 is now open to all. Domestic and international flights are pretty much welcome at the bigger and better terminal. Here are my candid shots of the T3...

T3 is posh and comfy. Foods are sumptuous. Books are good. But don't forget your atm/credit cards or crisp cash to sustain your needs inside the terminal. Posh and comfy equate to being pricey. Uhuh.

And oh, before I forget, delay is still inevitable. But when you need delay, it's nowhere to be found. Brand new terminal, same old delay. How ironic.

The Dreaded BAR

BAR. Just the mere thought of it makes me shiver and coat. What made me feel that way? Take this picture:

A total of 1,289 have passed the 2007 bar examinations, the Supreme Court announced on Saturday afternoon, making for a 22.91 percent passing rate as 5,626 law graduates from 109 law schools took the bar examinations September last year, reported PDI.

To note, the passing percentage was already adjusted to increase the number of passers. The report continued...

The 22.91-percent passing rate for the 2007 bar would have been much lower, perhaps an all-time low of 5 percent, had the passing rate not been adjusted from the traditional 75 percent to 70 percent. "Due to unusually strict corrections, it was decided to lower the passing grade to 70 percent," Associate Justice Adolf Azcuna said in a press conference.

That's how dreaded the exam is. That is also why BAR is pretty much feared. Imagine the fanfare. It is the only exam that catches mass media's attention from the first day of the examination up to the announcement of passers. Imagine the pressure and the rigors just to be called compañero or compañera or be admitted to the Integrated Bar of the Philippines (IBP). Attorney - just a title added to your name subsequent to passing the BAR. But getting it may mean going extra mile and be a victor. To some, losing courage and despair. To a few, losing their very sanity.

September is one of my favorite months. I was born in September, that's why. Unfortunately, it might transform into one of my "almost" hated since the entire month is for the Bar.

Tomorrow I will be going to Manila to feel the chill of Bar's first Sunday. Last year, I joined the BAROPS (Bar operations) Committee for the last Sunday of the exam. As they say and based on what I have witnessed, 4th Sunday of the Bar is no less than delirious. And that's not an overstatement.

This time around, I will be witnessing how barristers manage butterflies in their stomach, constipation/lbm, death-defying pressure (whatever that means), and so much more. Thanks to the Bar's morbidity. Thinking that I will be taking the Bar next year sends me creeps. Oh my.

Good luck to my friends, batchmates, and other barristers who will be taking the Bar this year. Give it your best shot! Aja!

Nightmarish Birthday

Today's my birthday. But unlike my previous birthdays, today's the most nightmarish I've ever had.

It's like everything is lost...almost. I lost my job (though I am now working). I don't get to see my close friends/co-employees that often. School's over so I'm missing my classmates as well. Strange thing is, I feel that this is just the start. More terrifying things are yet to arrive. What's the feeling?

Before this day is a strong storm. After today is a deluge.

Have you ever felt that way? I know, it's not good to trust your instincts most of the time. And I'm not doing that for the longest time. That's not what law school has taught me. I do exercise judgment without taking sides, without surmises and conjectures. Never whimsical.

But just for today lemme entertain my instinct. It's just so sad. Given the fact that my loved ones called me up, I still want them near. I'm used to being alone and independent. But today, yes today, it feels so wrong.

I AM MISSIN' PEOPLE.